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[May. 17th, 2008|11:26 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | at homez! | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  annoyed | ] |
seriously, my perception of you has changed. im so fucking disappointed/pissed/annoyed at you and your single-minded, individualistic opinions. you start saying your opinions about how we're not bonded. but friend, your words are so transparent and i read right through them straight to your heart, the organ that is not all muscle but deep within, a spirit of conscience and feeling. and trust me please, you're so easy to read, like a story book meant for kids, like seaseme street. so it's not your fault? all blame is on us? is that how you really feel? give me a break and look at yourself first.
as if we never tried, open your double-door, glue-shut eyes and see and notice: we're the ones always there, always wanting to BE there. you're the one always out there with somebody(s) else. but HEY! we never ever blamed you, we never ever blamed anyone, because, everyone has the right to be with the person/people they want to be with. yet, we'll always be there for you if you wanted to come join us. so now what? we're to blame because we're not bonded even though we always tried, and YOU, you always the one not being there. wow, this is really 'the best deceptions', as if dashboard confessionals wrote the song specially for you. and i believe they spewed all their emotions into it from that single organ that housed every feeling in it.
and what now? i like to shine like the stars? give me a break, you never ever wanted to play even if i went on my knees and begged you to.
but trust me, im never ever gonna do that, disgusting.
hello, im naturally a competitive person, i like to give it my best when it comes to doing something. why waste your little effort when you're not gonna give it your best, and just fool around? might as well not even TRY that single bit, don't waste your time. please, its better to put all the sweat, blood and toil to good use out there on the playing fields. thats my logic, i like to give it my best shot, and hence im a competitive person. furthermore, we play to enjoy and have fun. wheres the fun in fooling around and not giving it your best shot, and letting the opposition trample over you? might as well not play and just let them own you hands down. wheres the fun in that? im not saying that its a dire situation and we MUST win. what im saying is, how are you ever gonna have fun if you don't give it your best shot and enjoy it? even if it does not work out, at least we know we TRIED. definitely, we cannot win everything, but it definitely beats fooling around. like that play for fuck?! so just because of that i like to SHINE?!
and i like to lead?! wow, just shows you really don't know me. i'm fine with responsibilities, but even more, i love not being given authority over something, because i just simply prefer to lay back and not be held full account over something. don't get me wrong, if im given a duty, i'll put my heart and soul into it and carry it out dutifully. but did anybody volunteer to write the script? oh yes yes, you guys gave all your ideas and all your inputs, thanks for them. but did anybody volunteer to write the FUCKING script? NO. so i decided to take it up because i want us to do well. but then you come in and say that im doing everything and im leading the whole thing. yes thats true. but ask yourself, who wrote the fucking script because nobody wanted to? expect us all to follow your subsequent inputs on improvement? to a limited extent, yes, thats true, as long as it hails improvements in its way. yes friend, i actually bothered to listen to you, and not only you, allowed everybody to give their numerous feedback and opinions on improvement. and yes, i implemented some of them. so am i turning a deaf ear on you now?! did i really not give you a say? did i really lead EVERYTHING?
this whole issue just shows how you're so distant and disconnected from us. you don't understand how we roll. obviously, coming from your single-minded, individualistic opinions.
wake up lah, friend(?) |
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